New Chrysler Model Powered by Prayer

DETROIT / LAKE FOREST, CA — Struggling to emerge from its financial woes, automobile manufacturer Chrysler LLC, in partnership with pastor Rick Warren, has introduced a new model called the Jesus Chrysler. This alternative energy vehicle forgoes the conventional gasoline engine, running instead on “faith and prayer.”

DETROIT / LAKE FOREST, CA — Struggling to emerge from its financial woes, automobile manufacturer Chrysler LLC, in partnership with pastor Rick Warren, has introduced a new model called the Jesus Chrysler.   This alternative energy vehicle forgoes the conventional gasoline engine, running instead on “faith and prayer.”

An early draft of the operation manual instructs motorists to start the engine by reciting: “Please God, make this car move when I turn the key.”

“The base model will only operate if you are a believer,” according to Warren.  “Atheist, Jewish and Muslim drivers can purchase optional conversion kits.”

Calling the new vehicle “the first step toward the salvation of the auto industry,” Chrysler chief Robert Nardelli said the vehicles would roll off the assembly line sometime between Spring and the cataclysmic end of the world.

Braddon Mendelson