Trump Defends Miss California as "Perfectly Doable"

The growing controversy as to whether or not Miss California should keep her crown ended today when pageant owner Donald Trump declared the young beauty queen “perfectly doable.”

ORANGE COUNTY, CA — The growing controversy as to whether or not Miss California should keep her crown ended today when pageant owner Donald Trump declared the young beauty queen “perfectly doable.”

After Carrie Prejean, 21, expressed her views opposing gay marriage on the nationally televised Miss USA pageant, outraged viewers claimed the devout Christian — runner-up in the pageant — was being used as a puppet by the National Organization for Marriage, and should lose her position as California’s representative to the legendary beauty contest.

But Trump disagreed, explaining that Prejean’s political and religious beliefs have no bearing on her “doability.”

“With a body like that, no one’s looking at your opinions,” said the billionaire real estate developer. “She’s young, she’s hot and she entices men of all political persuasions to rise to the occasion.”

When semi-nude photos of Prejean turned up on the internet, Trump used them to prove his point.  He offered to fire Prejean and ruin her career if any man — straight or gay — could stare at the pictures for five minutes without getting aroused.

“There were no takers,” explained the Donald. “Her title stands.”

Braddon Mendelson