DENVER (TheSkunk.org) — The Romney campaign has released a list of the so-called “zingers” Governor Romney will be using at the debate against Barack Obama on October 3.
According to a spokesperson, Romney has been practicing using the zingers for months, and will be “flinging them toward the President at just the precise moment.”
Zingers for Governor Romney to Use at the Presidential Debate
“It was ineloquent of me to criticize 47 percent of the country; what I meant to say is 46-and-a-half.”
“Under President Obama, blue collars workers have changed the color of their shirts to red — beacuse red is the color of Communism. I know it’s also the color of the Republican party, but in this context, I meant Communism.”
“You want to see MY taxes? You’re the one whose policies are TAXING on the American people.”
“Sure, you got Bin Laden, but you’ve BIN LOADIN’ our country down with massive debt.”
“With Obama, it’s like Black Friday every Monday through Friday. And weekends.”
“Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to get away from this failed presidency.”
“Obama is trying to REFORM welfare — and he’s not even Jewish.”
“They say the President leads from behind — yeah, his wife’s!”
“He passed up a meeting with the Prime Minsiter of Israel in order to go play basketball — just think, Netanyahu was dissed by a nettin’ Yahoo.”
“I know how to turn this economy around. The only thing the President has turned around is something else that wasn’t the economy.”
“They say President Obama is more likeable than me — but ask yourselves, has likeability ever given you a tax break?”
An anonynmous source said the questionable strategy of publicly previewing the off-the-cuff remarks instead of delivering them in a spontaneous fashion at the debate is — in and of itself — the first zinger.