Romney Chooses Wallet as Running Mate
Mitt Romney surprised pundits on both sides of the aisle today when he announced his wallet will be joining the GOP ticket as his vice presidential running mate.
Articles written by Editors, The Skunk
Ketchup Linked to Lower Risk of Death
BATON ROUGE (TheSkunk.org) — There is good news for people who put ketchup on everything they eat. Researchers have discovered that excessive use
Romney Campaign Hiring Liars
BOSTON (TheSkunk.org) — Mitt Romney is looking for a few good liars. According to its website, the Romney for President campaign is hiring staffers
Romney Asks Nation to Decide What He Should Believe In
PITTSBURGH, PA (TheSkunk.org) — Presumptive Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney told supporters Monday that if elected president, he would poll
McCain Proposes New ‘Surge’ Strategy to Win War on Women
WASHINGTON (TheSkunk.org) — Senator John McCain today proposed a strategy to send an additional 20,000 Christian extremists into American towns and
Florida Passes ‘Kill the Negro’ Law
TALLAHASSEE, FL – Republican Governor Rick Scott today signed legislation that would make it legal to use lethal force against black citizens if they
New Arizona Law Says Life Begins at Fantasy
PHOENIX (TheSkunk.org) — Arizona lawmakers voted to pass legislation that defines life as beginning the moment a person fantasizes about having sex. “If
Secret Service Foils Colombian Prostitution Price Gouging Scheme
WASHINGTON (TheSkunk.org) – President Obama thanked the members of the Secret Service Wednesday for bringing an end to a Colombian prostitution price
More from this Author
North Korea’s ‘Satellites at Bottom of Sea’ Program a Success
North Korea successfully launched another multi-million dollar piece of electronic crap to the floor of the Atlantic Ocean Friday.
GOP Dead at 156
The Republican Party was found dead in its apartment Thursday, the victim of apparent suicide.
68% of Republicans Favor Concession Speech by Romney Over Santorum
Republicans overwhelmingly prefer Mitt Romney over Rick Santorum to make the late night concession speech and conciliatory phone call to Obama, according to a new poll released today.
Mastermind in ‘Bees for Honey’ Ring Nabbed in Sting Operation
Federal agents announced Monday the arrest of Guillermo “The Beekeeper” Patterson, leader of the notorious “Bees for Honey” ring, whose capture had eluded authorities for over seven years.
The Vomitorium
James Belushi stars as a scientist who gets caught in a time-warp and travels back to ancient Rome, where he is hired as an inspector for the city-state’s vomitoriums.
10 Most Restrictive Anti-Woman Laws of 2012
The ten most restrictive anti-woman laws passed by state legislatures in 2012.
Nationwide Theft of Fleet Enemas Sign of Struggling Economy, Mass Constipation
Over the past six months, the iconic green and white, oblong boxes have been reportedly pilfered from hundreds of retailers nationwide.
Virginia Governor Changes State’s Name to ‘Vagina’
“The State of Virginia cares about your vagina,” said McDonnell at a ceremony marking the state’s new moniker, “and that’s we can proudly say we are now all citizens of Vagina, and why I’m so proud to serve as your duly elected Vaginal head.”
Google Takes Street View into People’s Houses, Apartments
Google photographers will be sent into every residential house and apartment across the country, photographing each bathroom, bedroom, kitchen, nook, and cranny.
Would-Be Assassins Dissatisfied with GOP Candidates
A new CNN poll released today shows 83 percent of would-be assassins are dissatisfied with the current field of Republican presidential candidates.
Santorum Proposes ID System for Jews
WASHINGTON — In a speech before an enthusiastic audience at the annual CPAC convention, presidential candidate rick Santorum today proposed implementing a novel identification system to track the Jewish population in America.
Romney Campaign Uses Antisocial Media
BOSTON — Presidential candidate Mitt Romney took down his Facebook page Monday and replaced it with the words “Go Away,” making him the first politician to use antisocial media to spread his detached message of aloofness and indifference to American voters.
NRA Cites Rep. Giffords as Proof that ‘Guns Don’t Kill’
Rep. Gabrielle Giffords (D-AZ) was praised by the National Rifle Association for exemplifying their motto: “Guns Don’t Kill.”
Costa Concordia
An ad for the sunken Costa Concordia cruise ship gives promise for a new coral reef.
Cat’s Meow Doesn’t Wake Sleeping Family in Apt. Fire
VENICE, CA — Devon and Madeline Sutton died in an apartment fire Thursday, despite the cries of a three-year-old tabby cat who meowed vigorously.
Romney Wants U.S. Tax Revenue Paid Directly to Him
MANCHESTER, N.H. — In a speech to a group of supporters, Mitt Romney today proposed that all U.S. tax revenue be paid directly to him. Under the new “Internal Romney Service,” personal and corporate tax payments would no longer be made out to the “IRS,” but to “Mitt Romney,” and deposited electronically into his personal bank account.
All Those Niggahs
Joe and Alice Niggah, a middle-class, white couple from rural Kentucky, move their family into a house on a cul-de-sac in East Los Angeles, where they are affectionately known as “Those Niggahs Down the Street.” From Executive Producer Glenn Beck.
Newt Gingrich Sues Satire Website
LOS ANGELES — Presidential candidate Newt Gingrich filed a libel lawsuit today against website The Skunk (www.TheSkunk.org), claiming the satirical publication defamed his reputation in an article from last April titled “Gingrich Paid for Anal Bleachings with Government Funds.”
Dog Travels 1400 Miles Back to Its Old Cage at Animal Shelter
ALTOONA, AL (TheSkunk.org) — A female cocker spaniel traveresed a thousand miles of unfamiliar terrain for six weeks to make her way back to her old cage at the Etowah County Animal Shelter.
The 10 Greatest Jobs of 2012
As 2012 looms just around the corner, The Skunk is pleased to present its annual assessment of the ten greatest jobs of the new year.
Coca-Cola Puts Cocaine Back in Formula
ATLANTA (TheSkunk.org) — The Coca-Cola Company today announced the reintroduction of cocaine back into its popular soft drink after an absence of over a hundred years.
