International

Somali Pirates Based on Disney Movie, Ride

Somali Pirates Love Disney

HORN OF AFRICA — Referring to themselves as rascals, scoundrels, villains, and knaves, modern-day Somalian pirates have fashioned themselves after characters from Disney’s “Pirates of the Carribbean.”

Marine Life Protest North Korean Missile Attack

PACIFIC OCEAN — An alliance of squid, eels, rays, deep sea bass and other marine animals voiced their opposition to North Korea’s launch of a missile over the weekend that struck deep into their territory.

Tibetan Monk Accidentally Sets Himself on Fire

SHIGATSE, TIBET -– A Buddhist monk accidentally set himself on fire Friday, as an admiring group of followers cheered him on. The monk was cooking dinner when a defective burner on his gas stove malfunctioned, igniting the handmade Tibetan robe he was wearing.  Engulfed in flames, he blazed out the door and onto the street, wildly […]

Bush Seeks New Country to Bungle

New WOrlds to Conquer

CRAWFORD — Having recently traded in his White House address for a suburban home in this quiet Texas community, former President George Bush has expressed his desire to reenter public life by becoming the leader of some other yet-to-be-determined country.

Israel Surrenders; Agrees to Vacate Holy Land by End of Month

TEL AVIV — An unexpected resolution to the conflict in the Middle East occurred over the weekend as Israeli leaders agreed it was time to pack up and move on.