Filed Under: "oil spill"
Massive Water Spill Contaminates Oil Reserves
TORRANCE, CA (TheSkunk.org) — An underground water channel drilled into by the Sparkletts company burst open Saturday night, releasing millions of gallons of pure, crystal clear H2O into the oil reserves at the nearby ExxonMobil refinery.
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BP CEO Assures Public His Salary Will Not Be Affected by Spill
NEW ORLEANS (TheSkunk.com) — In a television commercial to be aired later this week, BP CEO Tony Hayward reassures the American people that his corporate compensation package will not be affected “in any way” by the oil spill. During the 60-second spot, Hayward offers a message of hope
Twitter Bird Falls Victim to Oil Spill
GRAND ISLE, La. (TheSkunk.org) — The oil-soaked body of the Twitter Bird, the iconic logo for the popular social networking site, was found on a contaminated beach on Friday. Wildlife officials tried to save the renowned fowl, but the
BP to Build Museum Dedicated to Species It Destroyed
PORT FOURCHON, La (TheSkunk.org) — BP announced today it will spend $50 million to build a museum dedicated to the plants and animals that have become extinct as a result of the company’s disastrous oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. “We
Oil Spill: Gas-X to the Rescue
GRAND ISLE, La. – In its latest attempt stop the unending flow of pressurized petroleum that has been spewing uncontrollably into the Gulf of Mexico, BP announced today it will inject 500 million bottles of Gas-X tablets into the well. “We know from personal experience this product is extremely
Spilled Oil Was Destined for Gas Station in Iowa
DES MOINES — BP informed the public on Thursday that the millions of barrels of oil spilling into the Gulf of Mexico were destined for a single gas station in Kimbalton, Iowa. In a letter sent to the town’s council members, BP CEO Tony Hayward expressed his regret. “We apologize to
Canadian Goose Who Survived Collision with US Airways Flight 1549 Dies in Gulf Spill
NEW ORLEANS — A four-year-old Canada goose, who nearly died in a bird strike when his flock was vaporized in the engine of an Airbus A320-214 that crash-landed in the Hudson River in 2009, was found dead of oil poisoning on the Louisiana shoreline. The goose, a native of Ottawa, was on a tour of
Arizona to Lower Concrete Boxes over Illegal Immigrants
PHOENIX — Arizona lawmakers today enacted legislation giving local police permission to lower thousands of 100-ton containers directly over the heads of suspected illegal immigrants. The four-story containment domes — similar in design to the one BP officials unsuccessfully sent to the bottom
Oprah to Be Lowered onto Oil Pipe to Cap Spill
VENICE, Louisiana – Saying it was her way of giving back to the American people for “allowing me to live my dream,” Oprah Winfrey has agreed to be lowered onto a broken oil pipe on the seafloor of the Gulf of Mexico that has been spewing thousands of barrels of toxic crude into the ocean on
McCain Drilling Plan: Pump Oil Directly into Ocean
NEW ORLEANS — John McCain announced today a plan for offshore rigs to pump oil directly into the ocean. “We already have the technology,” said McCain. “The United States is the best in the world when it comes to releasing petroleum directly into the seas. And our experience
