Filed Under: "recession"

Let them Eat Cake

Let Them Eat Cake

November 16, 2010

What are all those “Occupy Wall Street” folks mad about, anyway?

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Travel

Travel Industry Encourages Poor to Take More Vacations

By • on April 21, 2010

WASHINGTON — A report issued today by the United States Census Bureau reveals that poor Americans are not going on vacation nearly as often as their wealthy counterparts. And the travel industry is taking note. Based on a survey of 500 of the nation’s wealthiest and poorest individuals, the

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More Jobs

Employment Up for Stupid People

By • on October 24, 2009

WASHINGTON — Employment among imbeciles and morons rose 10% in the 2nd quarter of 2009, according to a new report released today by the U.S. Bureau of Statistics. In addition, findings indicated the jobless rate for buffoons was down 8%, with the filing of new unemployment claims tapering off substantially

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Unaffected by Recession

Cheap Bastards Unaffected by Recession

By • on July 6, 2009

WASHINGTON, DC — While the shaky economy has forced most Americans to cut back on their day-to-day living expenses, the U.S. Bureau of Economic Analysis reported that cheap bastards carry on as though nothing has changed. “Recession?” laughed Norton Bartel, a stingy plumber from Newark who’s

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print

Obama Wants Citizens to Print their Own Money

By • on February 16, 2009

DENVER (TheSkunk.org) — The way out of the country’s economic woes is to let citizens print their own money, said President Barack Obama to a cheering crowd of unemployed construction workers in the Mile High City. “This financial crisis is just too big for our resources in Washington,”

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Taxbreaks for Canadians

Republican Senators Approve Tax Breaks for Canadians

By • on February 14, 2009

OTTAWA — Dissatisfied with the stimulus package that made its way through Congress and the lack of conservative input contained therein, Republican senators voted unanimously over the weekend to give tax breaks to Canadians. “Since we were unable to convince our colleagues or a majority of

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White House Touts Double-Digit Employment

White House Touts Double-Digit Employment

By • on February 2, 2009

WASHINGTON, DC — A new report from the White House indicates that 93% of Americans currently have jobs, superseding previous accounts from the Bureau of Labor Statistics that 7% were out of work. “In only two weeks, we have gone from 7% unemployment to 93% employment,” said Speaker

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New Chrysler Model Powered by Prayer

New Chrysler Model Powered by Prayer

By • on January 21, 2009

DETROIT / LAKE FOREST, CA — Struggling to emerge from its financial woes, automobile manufacturer Chrysler LLC, in partnership with pastor Rick Warren, has introduced a new model called the Jesus Chrysler.   This alternative energy vehicle forgoes the conventional gasoline engine, running

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Santa Won’t be Coming to Your Town

Santa Won’t be Coming to Your Town

By • on December 21, 2008

Santa is skipping Christmas this year. In this video, he explains why.

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Man Sells Stuff on eBay

Man Sells Stuff on eBay to Pay for other Stuff

By • on December 10, 2008

TRENTON — A New Jersey man sold some of his stuff on eBay last week, and plans to use the money he makes to buy other stuff. “I realized there was a lot of stuff I had around my house — in my garage, under my bed, in the fridge — that I just never used, or got tired of using,”

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