Filed Under: "unemployment"
Stating the Obvious: Unemployment
“Stating the Obvious,” with host Duane Morgan. “Unemployment”
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Senator Wants Nation’s Jobless to be His Servants
WASHINGTON — After blocking passage of a jobless benefits bill, Senator Jim Bunning (R-KY) announced today he will compensate the nation’s unemployed by offering them non-paid positions as his personal servants. “They should consider it an internship,” said Bunning. “They will learn the
Americans Flee to Guatemala to Escape Bleak Job Market
GUATEMALA CITY — John Wilson holds a PhD in physics and has worked in the aerospace industry for over thirty years. Today he is selling cheese-stuffed pupusas — a native Guatemalan delicacy — from the back of a burro-driven wagon. With unemployment over 10 percent in the United States,
Employment Up for Stupid People
WASHINGTON — Employment among imbeciles and morons rose 10% in the 2nd quarter of 2009, according to a new report released today by the U.S. Bureau of Statistics. In addition, findings indicated the jobless rate for buffoons was down 8%, with the filing of new unemployment claims tapering off substantially
Unemployment Soars Among Unemployment Office Workers
SACRAMENTO — The California Employment Development Department (EDD), the agency responsible for distributing unemployment benefits to millions of the state’s laid-off employees, has itself begun laying off thousands of its own staff members. “It happened so sudden,” said Lester
White House Touts Double-Digit Employment
WASHINGTON, DC — A new report from the White House indicates that 93% of Americans currently have jobs, superseding previous accounts from the Bureau of Labor Statistics that 7% were out of work. “In only two weeks, we have gone from 7% unemployment to 93% employment,” said Speaker
