Trump to Bring Soviet-Era Bread Lines to U.S.

Mara Lago (TheSkunk.org) — President-Elect Donald Trump today promised to bring Soviet-era breadlines to the United States, referring to them as “so popular in the 80’s.” Citing the public yearning for nostaligia, Trump pondered, “Breadslines. Why don’t we have breadlines anymore?” His plan would require consumers to stand in line two or three hours to buy a loaf of bread. “Americans love to stand in line to vote,” he said. “Now that they’ll never have to cast another ballot, I’m offering something that can replace it and bring them great joy.” Trump said he may surprise the queue now and then by showing up at the front of the line and tossing “a loaf or two” at the crowd.