December 19, 2024

Obama's Senate Seat for Sale on eBay

SPRINGFIELD, IL — After the disclosure of Governor Blagojevich’s plan to accept a bribe in exchange for the senate seat vacated by Barack Obama, Ilinois state legislators decided to take the appointing powers out of the hands of the governor. “We weren’t completely against the idea of making money from an appointment,” said State Senator Joe Bolo, “but we wanted to do it in a fair and transparent manner. That’s when we decided to list the seat for sale on ebay.”

SPRINGFIELD, IL — After the disclosure of Governor Blagojevich’s plan to accept a bribe in exchange for the senate seat vacated by Barack Obama, Ilinois state legislators decided to take the appointing powers out of the hands of the governor.  “We weren’t completely against the idea of making money from an appointment,” said State Senator Joe Bolo, “but we wanted to do it in a fair and transparent manner.  That’s when we decided to list the seat for sale on ebay.”

Bidders must meet the constitutional qualificaitons of being 30 years of age, a citizen of the United States for 9 years, and must reside in the state of Illinois at the time of election.

A spokesperson for ebay said there was no policy prohibiting the auctioning of a political position. “We actually think it’s kinda cool,” said Ted Gardiner, eBay’s Director of Operations.

So far, bidders have raised the price to $3 million dollars, which is still below the reserve price set by legislators. “If Obama’s Senate seat ends up going for nine or ten million,” said Sen. Bolo, “we’ll finally be able to get our state out of hock.”

Braddon Mendelson