December 19, 2024

GOP Elephant Switches Parties

BALTIMORE — On the heels of Senator Arlen Specter’s jump to the Democratic Party, the GOP Elephant — longtime mascot of the Republicans — has announced he, too, is switching political affiliations.

BALTIMORE — On the heels of Senator Arlen Specter’s jump to the Democratic Party, the GOP Elephant — longtime mascot of the Republicans — has announced he, too, is switching political affiliations.

The elephant said it was Senator Specter who really opened the door for other like-minded mammals who have been feeling disenfranchised by their party.

“The Republican ideology is not congruent with that of an elephant,” noted the political pachyderm, who has been associated with the Grand Old Party for over 150 years.  “For one thing, I am totally in favor of gun control. Especially those – what do you call em? –oh yeah, Elephant Guns.”

The decision didn’t come easily for the elephant.  “I had been vacillating about it for quite awhile,” he said, “but when I saw those ivory trinkets in the office of the Republican National Committee, I knew it was time.”

Attorneys representing the elephant have demanded their client’s likeness be removed from all official party documents.

Until a suitable replacement can be found for the elephant, Chairman Michael Steele — the first African-American to head the RNC — told reporters that he will be serving as the interim mascot.

Braddon Mendelson