Poll: Cat Turd Leads Trump by 11 Percentage Points Nationally in Head-to-Head Matchup

WASHINGTON (TheSkung.org) – If the 2020 election were held today, a new poll shows that Trump would lose to excrement from various animals, including a cat turd.

According to a new poll from the Institute of Fecal Matter, a cat turd holds an 11 percentage-point lead over Trump. Dog shit holds a ten percentage-point lead. Pidgeon droppings have moved from a six point lead to a seven point lead over the current president.

Even Trump’s own poop would handily defeat him by three percentage points.

Vomit and a vial of semen would come out on top of Trump by two percentage-points each.

White House spokesperson Sara Huckabee Sanders called the poll “unscientific,” saying, “It’s too early to be assessing the outcome of the 2020 campaign. By the time the election rolls around, you may see the difference between the president and excrement has become virtually non-existent.”