Toddler Throws Poo at Bush

BLOOMINGTON, IN — A toddler threw poo at President Bush during a visit to a day care center, where Bush was speaking before a group of preschoolers and their parents.

Bush ducked, and the poo sailed past his head, splatting on the wall behind him.

The poo-thrower, identified as two-year-old Jason Barton, could be heard screaming, “Poo on you, poo on you.”

Throwing poo at someone is considered the ultimate insult among preschoolers.

“So what if the kid threw poo at me,” Bush told reporters in response to a question about the incident. “Let me talk about the kid throwing his poo. It’s one way to gain attention. It’s like going to a political rally and having people throw poo at you. It’s like driving down the street and having people throw poo at you. This is what happens in a free society where people throw poo at you.”

The child was taken into custody, and then released to his parents, who expressed their embarrassment over the episode. “This is very upsetting,” said Etta Barton. “He flung his poo from almost point-blank range and nearly hit the president square in the face.”

Roger Barton agreed. “Normally,” he said, taking his wife’s hand to console her, “his aim is much better.”