PORT FOURCHON, LA (TheSkunk.org) — BP announced today it will spend $50 million to build a museum dedicated to the plants and animals that have become extinct as a result of the company’s disastrous oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico.
ISLAMABAD — After the United States announced the killing of Al Qaeda’s “Number Three” leader, Mustafa Ahmed Muhammad Uthman Abu al-Yazid, the organization quickly named a successor.
Declaring that the United States will not commit itself to another unending, unwinnable conflict, President Obama today called for a complete withdrawal from the War on Poverty within 18 months.
In its latest attempt stop the unending flow of pressurized petroleum that has been spewing uncontrollably into the Gulf of Mexico, BP announced today it will inject 500 million bottles of Gas-X tablets into the well.
DES MOINES — BP informed the public on Wednesday that the millions of barrels of oil spilling into the Gulf of Mexico were destined for a single gas station in Kimbalton, Iowa.
A four-year-old Canada goose, who nearly died in a bird strike when his flock was vaporized in the engine of an Airbus A320-214 that crash-landed in the Hudson River in 2009, was found dead of oil poisoning on the Louisiana shoreline.
Arizona lawmakers today enacted legislation giving local police permission to lower thousands of 100-ton containers directly over the heads of suspected illegal immigrants.
ALICE SPRINGS, Australia — Scientists at NASA successfully completed their mission to verify the gravitational pull of an expensive item when dropped from high in the air.
WASHINGTON — A report issued today by the United States Census Bureau revealed that poor Americans are not going on vacation nearly as often as their wealthy counterparts.
VATICAN CITY—Announcing new guidelines on child abuse, Pope Benedict XVI said all priests have been instructed to “pull out” before climaxing.
