WASILLA, AK — Sarah Palin submitted a proposal today to stop illegal immigration and the oil spill at the same time by using those who have entered this country unlawfully to form a giant “Mound of Mexicans,” large enough to plug the leak.
Tag: bp
BP CEO Assures Public His Salary Will Not Be Affected by Spill
NEW ORLEANS (TheSkunk.org) — In a television commercial to be aired later this week, BP CEO Tony Hayward reassures the American people that his corporate compensation package will not be affected “in any way” by the oil spill.
BP Opens its First New Gas Station Since Oil Spill
BP shows off the first new gas station it built in the aftermath of its oil spill catastrophe in the Gulf of Mexico.
BP to Build Museum Dedicated to Species It Destroyed
PORT FOURCHON, LA (TheSkunk.org) — BP announced today it will spend $50 million to build a museum dedicated to the plants and animals that have become extinct as a result of the company’s disastrous oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico.
Spilled Oil Was Destined for Gas Station in Iowa
DES MOINES — BP informed the public on Wednesday that the millions of barrels of oil spilling into the Gulf of Mexico were destined for a single gas station in Kimbalton, Iowa.
Arizona to Lower Concrete Boxes over Illegal Immigrants
Arizona lawmakers today enacted legislation giving local police permission to lower thousands of 100-ton containers directly over the heads of suspected illegal immigrants.
Oprah to Be Lowered onto Oil Pipe to Cap Spill
VENICE, Louisiana – Saying it was her way of giving back to the American people for “allowing me to live my dream,” Oprah Winfrey has agreed to be lowered onto a broken oil pipe on the seafloor of the Gulf of Mexico that has been spewing thousands of barrels of toxic crude into the ocean on a daily basis.
