DAYTON, OH — With the announcement of Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska — a runner-up in the 1984 Miss Alaska pageant — as his choice
Month: August 2008
Hillary Hits the Trail for 2016
Hillary Clinton, barely recovering from her defeat in the 2008 Democratic primaries, has announced her candidacy for the 2016 presidential election.
Rush Limbaugh to Receive Oral-Anal Transplant
WASHINGTON, DC – Conservative talk show host Rush Limbaugh has undergone the world’s first successful oral-anal transplant.
Obama Offers Clinton Cabinet Position
DENVER, CO — In a conciliatory gesture to his opponent, Senator Obama today reached out to Senator Clinton by offering her the cabinet position of “Secretary of
McCain Selects Obama for Running Mate
ARIZONA – In a surprise move early this morning, Sen. John McCain announced that Barack Obama will be his running mate for the 2008 presidential
Obama Chooses Self for V.P.
DENVER, CO — In a stunning turn of events early this morning, Senator Barack Obama announced that he would be his own running mate in
McCain Drilling Plan: Pump Oil Directly into Ocean
NEW ORLEANS, LA — John McCain announced today a plan for offshore rigs to pump oil directly into the ocean.
McCain Vetting VPs over Strip Poker
John McCain will be hosting an evening of strip poker at his ranch in Sedona, Arizona.
Cheney to Build Abu Ghraib Amusement Park
Dick Cheney plans to build a theme park inspired by the infamous Baghdad prison complex. Located just outside Philadelphia, not far from Independence Hall, Fifty Flags Over Abu Ghraib will be an entertaining tribute to the administration of President George W. Bush.
McCain Sets New Record for Use of Term "Surge"
LOS ANGELES – Before an audience of mostly independent voters, Senator John McCain mentioned the word “Surge” four-hundred, eighteen times, setting a new record for
