December 19, 2024

Lipstick-Wearing Pig Offended by McCain Comments

Lipstick-Wearing Pig Offended by McCain CommentsFAIRFAX, VA — John McCain accused Senator Obama today of making a disparaging reference to Gov. Sarah Palin by uttering the phrase “You can put lipstick on a pig, but it’s still a pig.”

This offended Osco, a locally raised, lipstick-wearing pig from a farm in Canton.  “Wearing lipstick is a personal choice,” said Osco.  “But to be compared to a Republican — of either gender — is grossly offensive.”

In a statment to the press, Osco said that Senator Obama was clearly not referencing Gov. Palin in the remark and had merely misspoke.

“What Senator Obama meant to say,” explained the pig, “was, ‘You can put lipstick on a self-righteous, backwoods, immoral, gun-toting, hypocrite from Alaska — but she’s still a bitch.'”

The McCain campaign called the comments “insensitive and rude.”

“I’m a pig for godsakes, what do you expect?” Osco shook his head in disbelief. “Get over it.”

Braddon Mendelson