LOS ANGELES (TheSkunk.org) — The recent rainstorm that swept across Southern California, causing landslides in areas devastated by recent fires and forcing the closure of Highway 101 through Malibu, was the result of “poor management of the clouds,” according to President Trump.
In a statement released Wednesday from the White House, Trump criticized Governor Jerry Brown for not “de-raining” the skies in the months preceding the storm. “This mismanagement of the clouds, by a bunch of Democrat lawmakers who should be in jail, is a national disgrace.”
Trump claimed that by dropping planeloads of sawdust and rice into the clouds, any rain water contained therein would “simply be absorbed.” Although there have been no scientists – or anyone else on Earth – who agrees with the President’s assessment, Trump held steadfast in his assertion.
“I know more than the scientists,” said Trump. “Even though I’ve never experienced a landslide, I was born with an instinct for downfalls.”
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You have his character down perfectly.