Cross Tattooed on Clarence Thomas's Lower Back Violates Separation of Church and State, Says Sotomayor
Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor issued a formal complaint about a cross tattooed on Clarence Thomas’s lower back —
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New TSA Rule: No Bombs in Carry-On
The TSA’s “Prohibited Items” list, which has been evolving since 9/11, forbids passengers from bringing certain potentially dangerous objects onto a plane, including axes and hatchets, cattle prods, crowbars, dynamite, fireworks, hand grenades and large bottles of shampoo, but until now, has never specifically prohibited bombs.
Kucinich Demands Recount
Over a year has passed since the 2008 presidential election, and Dennis Kucinich still thinks he won. “I am confident,” said Kucinich, “that once the American people examine the facts, they will agree that I am their president.”
Hollywood’s Talent-Challenged Celebrate Life of Brittany Murphy
HOLLYWOOD, Ca — Scores of unsuccessful actors, bad writers, producers of B-movies and Gary Coleman gathered today at the Hollywood Forever cemetery to celebrate the life of the late Brittany Murphy.
Palin Fans Can't Read Book
FORKS BEND, KY – Some fans of Sarah Palin were disappointed with the former Alaska Governor’s best seller, “Going Rogue,” when they realized they were unable to decipher its contents.
Joe Biden Crashes State Dinner
WASHINGTON — Vice President Joe Biden exposed a breach in security last week when he showed up at a White House state dinner, uninvited.
World Asks: Who the F*** Are Jon and Kate?
HOLLYWOOD, CA — Television personalities “Jon and Kate” are the most baffling celebrities in the history of the entertainment industry, according to a recent poll conducted by TheSkunk.org.
Palin Accidentally Burns Her Own Book
ANTWILLIE, TENN — Former Governor of Alaska Sarah Palin attended a book burning rally Friday, where she unwittingly participated in the incineration of hundreds of copies of her upcoming autobiography, “Going Rogue.”
Palin Vagina Announces Run for Senate
The vagina of former vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin announced this morning its plan to run for the Senate seat from Alaska in 2010.
Balloon Man Claims Wife Jammed Inside Cow Rectum
Richard Heene, the self-proclaimed scientist who incited public outrage by deceiving authorities into believing his six-year-old son was aloft inside a homemade weather balloon, has made another panicked plea for help, this time claiming his wife Mayumi was carried away inside the intestines of an angry cow.
