Skunk Tag: sarah palin
Rejected Super Bowl Commercials 2010 | #6
“The Academy of Sarah Palin Look-Alikes” « Previous Commercial
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The Skunk News | January 2010
The Skunk News Webcast from January 2010. John McCain’s new book. More on Tiger Woods. Obama’s Hollywood dreams.
GOP opposes ‘public option’ for Haitians
WASHINGTON — Republican lawmakers today strongly condemned President Obama’s use of a government funded “public option” to provide medical aid to
Palin fans can’t read book
FORKS BEND, KY – Some fans of Sarah Palin were disappointed with the former Alaska Governor’s best seller, “Going Rogue,” when they realized they were unable
Palin accidentally burns her own book
ANTWILLIE, TENN — Former Governor of Alaska Sarah Palin attended a book burning rally Friday, where she unwittingly participated in the incineration of hundreds of copies of her upcoming autobiography “Going Rogue.” Palin made the planned stop at the small Church of Righteous Indignation to
Palin vagina announces run for senate
The vagina of former vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin announced this morning its plan to run for the Senate seat from Alaska in 2010. Palin speaks without the benefit of her vagina The vagina said it is no longer associated with Palin, and looks forward to expressing its own views, independent
Sarah Palin to run for Governor of Alaska
ANCHORAGE — Former Governor of Alaska Sarah Palin has announced plans to run for Governor of Alaska in the 2010 election. Citing her self-abbreviated previous term as Chief Executive of the country’s largest state, the dropout governor asserted that her two-and-a-half-years-in-office gives
Palin baby to be sacrificed to volcano gods
JUNEAU, AK — Sniglet Palin, three-year-old daughter of former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin, is scheduled to be thrown into Mt. Redoubt, a 10,197-foot active volcano 103 miles west of Anchorage, to please the fire
Alaska Supreme Court to rule on partial-term administrations
JUNEAU, AK — No sooner did Governor Sarah Palin decide to abort her term in office after serving only two-and-a-half years, than debate began among Alaskans as to what constitutes a so-called “partial-term” administration. The Alaska Supreme Court today is hearing arguments on both
Palin pronounced brain-dead
WASILLA — Alaska Governor Sarah Plain was pronounced brain-dead Friday after reporters found her outside her Wasilla home, mumbling incoherently. Wasilla Fire Department Capt. Ben Stemple said that paramedics responded to a 911 call from the home. When they arrived, Palin was telling reporters
Republicans propose Ayatollah system for U.S.
WASHINGTON, DC – In a speech at a recent Republican fundraiser, former House Speaker New Gingrich proposed that the United States adopt an Iranian-style Ayatollah form of government. “We can keep the showy remnants of our democracy,” explained Gingrich, “while ceding ultimate power to a
Palin’s daughter gives birth to Democrat
ANCHORAGE, Alaska – The teenage daughter of former Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin gave birth to a Democrat on Sunday, marking an ironic resolution to the controversy surrounding the unwed teen mother. 18-year-old Bristol Palin gave birth to Frickin Johnston on Sunday. The 7 pound,
Santa Won’t be Coming to Your Town
Santa is skipping Christmas this year. In this video, he explains why.
Palin Caught in Prank Jesus Call
JUNEAU, AK — Former vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin had a brief phone conversation with a man she believed was Jesus Christ, who promised to make her president in 2012. The call was later revealed to be a prank. “The voice sounded like it could easily have been that of our lord
Gov. Palin to be Replaced with SNL’s Tina Fey
NEW YORK — In yet another stunning announcement from the McCain campaign, the Republican presidential nominee said that he will be replacing his vice presidential running mate, Sarah Palin, with Tina Fey, the writer-producer-actor who portrayed Palin in a series of sketches on Saturday Night
Russian Plans to Invade Alaskan Air Space Thwarted by Governor Palin
WASILLA, AK– A secret Russian military operation designed to fly President Putin through Alaskan airspace and return him safely to Moscow was thwarted by Governor Sarah Palin, when she went on a major American television network and revealed the plan. “As Putin rears his head and comes
Pelosi on Palin: Way too Young
WASHINGTON — Representative Nancy Pelosi, Speaker of the House of Representatives and second in line for the presidency, expressed her disappointment in the selection of Sarah Palin as the Republican VP candidate, saying that John McCain, 72, should have
Lipstick-Wearing Pig Offended by McCain Comments
FAIRFAX, VA — John McCain accused Senator Obama today of making a disparaging reference to Gov. Sarah Palin by uttering the phrase “You can put lipstick on a pig, but it’s still a pig.” This offended Osco, a locally raised, lipstick-wearing pig
Sarah Palin to Celebrate Election Victory by Getting Pregnant
LEBANON, Ohio — Gov. Sarah Palin expects to win the vice presidency of the United States, and when she does, her fist order of business is to get herself “in a family way” — again. “How wonderful it would be to conceive a child in the
Hillary Voters Change Minds about Important Issues to Vote for Palin
PHILADELPHIA, PA — A surprising BSN poll conducted this morning indicated that almost half of the women who supported Hillary Clinton in the primaries have dramatically changed their opinions on major liberal issues, just so they can vote for Republican Vice
Warren Jeffs Finds Republicanism in Prison
DRAPER, UT — Disgraced cult leader and delusional kiddie-pimp, Warren Jeffs, currently serving 10 years to life at Utah State Prison, has started a fresh chapter in his life with the declaration of his newly inspired devotion to the Republican party. Jeffs
McCain Names Cheerleader Secretary of State
MINNEAPOLIS – On the tails of his controversial vice-presidential selection, Senator John McCain has made yet another startling announcement, this time telling an audience of steelworkers that 16-year-old Emma Rae Schurr of Bulls Gap, Tennessee will be his
Psychic Predicts Complete Text of McCain Acceptance Speech
ST. PAUL, MN / SPECIAL TO THE SKUNK — The head psychic on staff at TheSkunk.org has peered into the mind of John McCain to obtain the highly guarded acceptance speech he will be delivering tonight at the Republican Convention. What follows is the full speech, pieced together directly from Senator
Palin’s three-year-old daughter pregnant
ST. PAUL — Republican Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin has announced today that her three-year-old daughter, Sniglet, is four-months pregnant. “We’re very proud that Sniglet has chosen to keep the baby,” said Palin, “and prouder that she was able to do it without any
Statutory rape to be legal in Alaska
JUNEAU, AK — Governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin, the Republican Vice Presidential nominee, has proposed new legislation that would legalize sexual relations with a minor. “Bristol’s Law,” named after Gov. Palin’s 17-year-old daughter who was impregnated by an 18 year old hockey
McCain Taps Beauty Queen to Rally Horny Vote
DAYTON, OH — With the announcement of Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska — a runner-up in the 1984 Miss Alaska pageant — as his choice for vice president, Senator John McCain believes he is making progress in bringing the “horny” vote to his camp. “In my search for a
