NRA Cites Rep. Giffords as Proof that ‘Guns Don’t Kill’
Rep. Gabrielle Giffords (D-AZ) was praised by the National Rifle Association for exemplifying their motto: “Guns Don’t Kill.”
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Cat’s Meow Doesn't Wake Sleeping Family in Apt. Fire
VENICE, CA — Devon and Madeline Sutton died in an apartment fire Thursday, despite the cries of a three-year-old tabby cat who meowed vigorously.
Romney Wants U.S. Tax Revenue Paid Directly to Him
MANCHESTER, N.H. — In a speech to a group of supporters, Mitt Romney today proposed that all U.S. tax revenue be paid directly to him. Under the new “Internal Romney Service,” personal and corporate tax payments would no longer be made out to the “IRS,” but to “Mitt Romney,” and deposited electronically into his personal bank account.
Dog Travels 1400 Miles Back to Its Old Cage at Animal Shelter
ALTOONA, AL (TheSkunk.org) — A female cocker spaniel traveresed a thousand miles of unfamiliar terrain for six weeks to make her way back to her old cage at the Etowah County Animal Shelter.
The 10 Greatest Jobs of 2012
As 2012 looms just around the corner, The Skunk is pleased to present its annual assessment of the ten greatest jobs of the new year.
Coca-Cola Puts Cocaine Back in Formula
ATLANTA (TheSkunk.org) — The Coca-Cola Company today announced the reintroduction of cocaine back into its popular soft drink after an absence of over a hundred years.
Local Walmart Apologizes for Accidentally Carrying Hanukkah Wrapping Paper
FAIRHOPE, AL (TheSkunk.org) — Christian protestors expressed their outrage yesterday outside the Wal-Mart on County Road, after someone in their Church discovered Hanukkah wrapping paper for sale in a bin at the end of the Christmas aisle.
Chris Christie Vows to Keep Eating Until He’s ‘Bigger Than Taft’
TRENTON, NJ — Governor Chris Christie responded today to criticism of his obesity by announcing plans to continue expanding his waistline until he is “bigger and heavier than that fat fuck William Taft.”
Mitt Romney: 'S Corporations are People with Spina Bifida'
GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney told students at the University of New Hampshire that “S corporations are people with spina bifida.”
Postal Service to Increase Efficiency by Sending Employee Paychecks in the Mail
The U.S. Postal Service today announced plans to increase speed and efficiency by sending postal worker paychecks through the mail.
