WASHINGTON — In a speech before an enthusiastic audience at the annual CPAC convention, presidential candidate rick Santorum today proposed implementing a novel identification system to track the Jewish population in America.
BOSTON — Presidential candidate Mitt Romney took down his Facebook page Monday and replaced it with the words “Go Away,” making him the first politician to use antisocial media to spread his detached message of aloofness and indifference to American voters.
Rep. Gabrielle Giffords (D-AZ) was praised by the National Rifle Association for exemplifying their motto: “Guns Don’t Kill.”
An ad for the sunken Costa Concordia cruise ship gives promise for a new coral reef.
VENICE, CA — Devon and Madeline Sutton died in an apartment fire Thursday, despite the cries of a three-year-old tabby cat who meowed vigorously.
MANCHESTER, N.H. — In a speech to a group of supporters, Mitt Romney today proposed that all U.S. tax revenue be paid directly to him. Under the new “Internal Romney Service,” personal and corporate tax payments would no longer be made out to the “IRS,” but to “Mitt Romney,” and deposited electronically into his personal bank account.
Joe and Alice Neggah, a middle-class, white couple from rural Kentucky, move their family into a house on a cul-de-sac in East Los Angeles, where they are affectionately known as “Those Neggahs Down the Street.” From Executive Producer Glenn Beck.
LOS ANGELES — Presidential candidate Newt Gingrich filed a libel lawsuit today against website The Skunk (www.TheSkunk.org), claiming the satirical publication defamed his reputation in an article from last April titled “Gingrich Paid for Anal Bleachings with Government Funds.”
ALTOONA, AL (TheSkunk.org) — A female cocker spaniel traveresed a thousand miles of unfamiliar terrain for six weeks to make her way back to her old cage at the Etowah County Animal Shelter.
As 2012 looms just around the corner, The Skunk is pleased to present its annual assessment of the ten greatest jobs of the new year.
Trump Musk 
Trump to Bring Soviet-Era Bread Lines to U.S. 
Jackie Kennedy Attemps Shoe Retrieval 
Disneyland to Remove Matterhorn, Replace with Tilt-A-Whirl 
Abortions Allowed in Texas if Trump is the Father 
