SACRAMENTO — Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger today declared that IOUs will be the new currency of the State of California.
“Since we can’t print our own money like the federal government,” explained the former Mister Universe, “we will issue IOU forms that will allow politicians in Sacramento, as well as average citizens, to pay creditors with a promise to pay them, in lieu of actually paying them.”
Consumers will be able to walk into any retail establishment, purchase something for any amount, and pay for it by filling out an official “California IOU” that promises to pay the merchant at some undetermined point in the unspecified future.
The cost of printing the IOU forms, estimated to be $100 million, will be covered entirely by issuing IOUs to the printing company. “It won’t cost taxpayers a dime,” said Schwarzenegger. “That’s the beauty of it.”
According to Schwarzenegger, plans are being made to allow Californians to eventually trade their California IOUs for Golden State Promissory Notes, which will be “larger and more colorful.”