Trump Vows to Keep Trains Running on Time

WASHINGTON (TheSkunk.org) — In a series of late night tweets, President Trump yesterday set as a goal the absolute precision of Amtrak arrival and departure timetables. “If a train is supposed to leave from Newark at a certain time,” he wrote, “it should leave at that time and not at another time.”

In another tweet he added, “Everybody knows Obama’s trains were minutes and seconds late. His trains did not run on time. Sad.”

Spokesperson Sarah Huckabee Sanders noted that whatever opinion one has of the president, “he will go down in history as one of a select group of world leaders who kept his commitment to the railroad industry.”

“However history books view Donald Trump a hundred years from now,” added Sanders, “they will all agree that he kept the trains running on time.”

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