In a press release issued yesterday, Satan has distanced himself from Reverend Jeremiah Wright, the contentious Chicago pastor who created a maelstrom of controversy for his former congregant, Senator Barack Obama.
Satan said that although he has been the “lifelong spiritual mentor” to Reverend Wright, he can no longer condone the recent comments made by the firey preacher.
“First, he goes on YouTube and steals the credit for the damnation of America away from me and hands it to God,” said the Prince of Darkness. “Then he claims the United States was responsible for HIV and 9/11. Rubbish. Everyone knows those were both my doing. I have no choice but to condemn this man and all his assertions, none of which reflects who I am, my beliefs or my great many accomplishments.”
In an appearance on “The Larry King Show,” Reverend Wright defended his words. “It’s understandable that Satan would say whatever he thinks will appease the media,” said Wright. “This a presidential campaign; he’s working hard to keep the Republicans in office and he can’t afford to have the nation focused on this distraction.”
Satan declined an offer to appear on the show, stating that Larry King will have the opportunity to interview him face-to-face in exactly sixteen months, two days, thirteen hours and twenty-five minutes.