BOZEMAN, MT — A powerful insurance lobby today denied compensation to a man it hired to disrupt a town hall meeting on healthcare reform, asserting that he had “pre-existing ignorance.”
In a recent opinion poll, consumers preferred the new Union Bank logo, a swollen red vagina, to Walmart’s yellow puckered anus, by a margin of two-to-one.
ANCHORAGE — Former Governor of Alaska Sarah Palin has announced plans to run for Governor of Alaska in the 2010 election.
LOS ANGELES — The Writers Guild of America, the collective bargaining organization for professional Hollywood screen and television writers, has published a list of three of its members who will be euthanized for crossing picket lines during the 2007 strike.
Technology tiring you out? You might have a case of ‘lectronic Overload. An original Music Video from TheSkunk.org.
ANCHORAGE — Sniglet Palin, three-year-old daughter of former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin, is scheduled to be thrown into Mt. Redoubt, a 10,197-foot active volcano 103 miles west of Anchorage, to please the fire gods.
SALEM, OR – NFL expansion team, the “Fighting Bulldogs” – who have been struggling every season to fill their stadium — have signed a two-year, $500 million dollar deal with disgraced quarterback Michael Vick, the former football star who served 19 months in federal prison for his conviction on running a dogfighting ring.
BUTTE, MO — Due to a loophole in the federal “Cash for Clunkers” program, local dentist Halman Johnson was able to bring his wife of twenty-two years into the local Ford dealership and walk away with $4500 cash and a 2010 Escort Cabriolet hybrid.
HOLLYWOOD, CA — Katie Holmes has been cast in the role of Nicole Kidman, Tom Cruise’s first wife, in a biographical motion picture about the life of the leading man.
Iran’s President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad formally endorsed himself for a second term as president Monday in a ceremony that sought to quell discontent among Iranians, by declaring himself a worthy leader.
Trump Renames ‘Greenland’ to ‘White Land’ 
Trump to Remove Indigo from Color Spectrum 
Trump Musk 
Trump to Bring Soviet-Era Bread Lines to U.S. 
Jackie Kennedy Attemps Shoe Retrieval 
