WASHINGTON, DC—The United States Congress is outsourcing its workload to a contactor in Malaysia, according to a report by the U.S. Government Accountability Office. Beginning this month, the laborious task of lawmaking will be sent to the Tengku Wan Consulting and Sewage Company in Kuala Lumpur.
CLEVELAND, OH – Senator McCain rejected yet another religious endorsement, today, this time from a…
WEST PALM BEACH, FL — A reporter was nearly beaten to death last night after a confrontation with former president Bill Clinton, who was vacationing in the resort town with his family.
CHICAGO — Barack Obama will be the opening act for Led Zeppelin’s “Man Are We…
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Senators Ted Stevens (R-Alaska) and Larry Craig (R-Idaho) have introduced legislation that…
NASA’s recent confirmation that water exists on Mars has the White House maneuvering in an…
Washington, D. C. — Taking its cue from the International Astronomical Union, which declared in…
Recounting how his own Naval record — being shot out of the sky as a…
Citing Barack Obama’s “wisdom beyond his years,” President Bush revealed today that he will be…
In a nationwide survey conducted Tuesday, John McCain received the support of 58% of Americans with droopy jowls.
Trump Musk 
Trump to Bring Soviet-Era Bread Lines to U.S. 
Jackie Kennedy Attemps Shoe Retrieval 
Disneyland to Remove Matterhorn, Replace with Tilt-A-Whirl 
Abortions Allowed in Texas if Trump is the Father 
