Filed Under: "democrats"
Obama Sets Timetable for War on Poverty
Declaring that the United States will not commit itself to another unending, unwinnable conflict, President Obama today called for a complete withdrawal from the War on Poverty within 18 months.
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GOP Introduces ‘Minority Rules’ Bill
WASHINGTON — The 41 Republican Senators introduced a bill today to create a “minority rules” system, allowing them to impose their unpopular policies with fewer than fifty percent of the vote. “The Democrats have controlled Congress with their elected majorities for too long,”
Republicans Claim Victory in Passing Healthcare Reform
WASHINGTON — In an apparent about-face, members of the Republican party are not only embracing the recently passed healthcare reform legislation as their own, but insisting its success stems from two minor provisions GOP leaders insisted be stricken from the bill on a technicality. The minor provisions,
Republican Senators Approve Tax Breaks for Canadians
OTTAWA — Dissatisfied with the stimulus package that made its way through Congress and the lack of conservative input contained therein, Republican senators voted unanimously over the weekend to give tax breaks to Canadians. “Since we were unable to convince our colleagues or a majority of
White House Touts Double-Digit Employment
WASHINGTON, DC — A new report from the White House indicates that 93% of Americans currently have jobs, superseding previous accounts from the Bureau of Labor Statistics that 7% were out of work. “In only two weeks, we have gone from 7% unemployment to 93% employment,” said Speaker
Hillary Voters Change Minds About Important Issues to Vote for Palin
PHILADELPHIA, PA — A surprising BSN poll conducted this morning indicated that almost half of the women who supported Hillary Clinton in the primaries have dramatically changed their opinions on major liberal issues, just so they can vote for Republican Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin in
Rush Limbaugh to Receive Oral-Anal Transplant
WASHINGTON, DC — Conservative talk show host Rush Limbaugh has undergone the world’s first successful oral-anal transplant. The procedure, pioneered by Dr. Kenneth Fargonian of Bethesda Naval Hospital, involves surgically removing the patient’s anus and mouth, swapping them with one






